Alissa6:30 am thoughts from my journal this morning (edited to flow better).
Let’s talk about trusting the process.
What does it mean? It’s this overused phrase thrown around like stale popcorn in a movie theater with worn-out chairs. It’s one of those phrases you hear, nod your head, then go back to worrying about whatever it is you like to worry about.
Trusting the process is weighty. When you break it down, it’s gnarly. When you actually put it into practice, you’ve never been more uncomfortable. Because it’s not what you’re used to. Most of us don’t trust the process because it doesn’t feel safe or certain. And us, with our 10-year plans and Pinterest wedding boards… we like safety and certainty.
Trusting the process is about having faith that the next step is there without being able to see it. It’s about letting go of control, (seriously, let go), and allowing yourself to be led, step by step, through the wild unknown. It’s walking through the fog and committing to stubbing your toe a few times while you stumble to find your way.
It’s also about not getting discouraged by your inevitable wrong turns, mistakes, detours. If you fall apart or give up after the first misstep, you’re toast. We didn’t promise that trusting the process was going to be comfy, did we?
Trusting the process is about trusting yourself.
Can you trust yourself to make good choices? Can you trust your judgment? Can you trust your heart?
If you can’t, it’s time to start learning how. If you don’t know where to start, ask yourself why you don’t trust you. Then get to work on changing that. Start keeping the promises you make to yourself. Show yourself the ways that you’re a reliable source.
When we have trouble trusting the process, it’s because we want certainty and safety before taking a leap. Am I going to be okay after this? What if I mess up? Are people going to make fun of me? We want to know with 100% certainty and an official stamp of approval that this decision we’re making is right. We want to know that it’s lucrative, beneficial, wise.
That isn’t what trusting the process is, though. It isn’t safe and it’s certainly not in your comfort zone. Actually, if you can be certain of one thing, it’s that it’s uncomfortable. Trusting the process is feeling scared and acting anyway because you believe in this idea in your mind or this dream in your heart.
Trusting the process means you’re willing to look silly sometimes.
It means you’re willing to field questions and sideways glances because you believe the voice inside of you more than what other people say.
Trusting the process takes courage. It’s reserved for the brave souls willing to trust themselves or at least try. It’s for the people who’d rather follow their heart than get herded like sheep along with the rest of society.
And as you walk through the fog of uncertainty, you’ll undoubtedly bump up against your deepest fears. You’ll come face-to-face with your insecurities and the parts of you that you don’t quite trust. That’s part of the process, too. A critical part, actually. That’s where people turn back to their comfort zone.
Can you overcome it? Can you be brave enough to look your insecurities in the face and say “I’ve got this”? Even if you don’t fully mean in yet. Can you try?
Why would you trust the process if it’s so uncomfortable?
Have you ever heard the saying, ‘No guts, no glory?’
The glory is reserved for the gutsy folks who put themselves out there, trust the process, and risk being kicked around a little bit. When you trust the process, you’ll get gritty. And you’ll gain confidence because you’ll see that you can withstand uncomfortable shit that most people are afraid of.
And hey, you’re scared too. The difference is that you keep going. That’s really cool.
When you trust the process, you’ll get keys to these hidden doors that would’ve stayed forever locked if you’d just stayed safe. It sounds esoteric, but it’s real. Behind those doors are levels of joy, exuberance, fulfillment, purpose, passion, and bliss you would’ve never experienced otherwise.
If you want to live without regrets; if you want to stop making excuses for yourself; if you want to actually stop staying stuck; if you want to just follow through for once… trust the process.
With love,
Alissa
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